Step One to Being a Better Manager  - Discover Your Purpose

As an executive coach, I help new managers get started and experienced managers get better. This unique situation allows me to make observations that others cannot. 

One such observation is that many managers who ask me for coaching support are frustrated with their current situation. They are challenged when making decisions and struggle to deal with day-today work situations. As I deepen the level of coaching with these clients, it becomes apparent that they do not have a clear sense of purpose.  One decision has lead to another and they have never really stopped to question what they want out of life, work and relationships.  They are frustrated with their perceived lack of control of where they are going. Yet, they continue day after day to chase something they really are not sure they want.

You cannot manage others unless you have discovered your purpose. Or as best-selling author Stephen Covey puts it “There is no way you can make significant progress in your relationships with other people if your own life is a mess …” Having a purpose means you engage in work that genuinely uses your talents and motivates you. You know what you want out of life and you have a plan to get there.

The good news is that there are many books, workshops and seminars available to help you begin living your life by choice instead of chance. The good ones help you take stock of where you are, decide where you want to go and make a plan on how to get there. With reflection and effort you quickly get on the way to creating the life you want.

One might conclude that my coaching sessions soon lead to a mass exodus of managers searching for new jobs or companies.  This is not so. My second observation is that many people are in the right place, doing what they want to do. They just need confirmation that that is the case. Going through the process of assessment, goal-setting and planning provides assurance for many people that they are doing the right thing. They have to tweak a few things and adjust some priorities, but they are on the right road.

Managers who have found their sense of purpose positively influence others within the organization. They enhance the performance of the others around them because they are focused, purposeful and well balanced. They make better decisions and provide perspective. This is why discovering your purpose is an essential first step to being a better manager.

The Makings of a Leader

The term leadership seems to be thrown around quite a bit these days. Elections, corporate buyouts, job interviews … seems everyone either wants leadership or claims to have it.

So what exactly makes someone a leader? What is it about them that set them apart? What is it about them that we want to be around them and be a part of what they are doing?

If you have been fortunate to work with a leader, you know that leadership is easy to recognize but not easy to explain.  I count myself lucky to have worked with a true leader. While I don’t know what made him a leader, I do know some of the things he did. Perhaps looking at these can help all of us be a little more of a leader.

He told people what to do, not how to do it. He described the end-point, not the steps need to get there. This encouraged people to think, innovate and be creative.

He demanded excellence, not perfection. He expected everyone to be as committed to the goal as he was. He expected everyone to do his best. He also knew that there were many ways of getting things done and his way was not the only way.

He took care of his people. He knew everyone who worked for him as an individual. He knew their strengths and weaknesses, their aspirations and their fears. He would always stand up for his group and take responsibility if there were shortfalls. He accepted that he was responsible for the actions of all team members.

He was humble and always trying to improve. He never tried to show that he was better than others. He was comfortable with admitting mistakes though they were few and in retrospect probably not his doing. He knew that “taking one for the team” was much better than saving face to outsiders but losing respect from the team members.

He was genuine, the true what-you-see-is-what-you-get person. He didn’t change his story depending on who was in the meeting. He spoke and acted the same with everyone. He didn’t pretend to be interested in your weekend; he was interested.

So what do you think? How many of these do you do consistently? Rate yourself from 1 to 10 on each one. If you think you are doing great, get a second opinion and ask someone you work with to rate you. Pick one from the list and work at it. Trying to improve is in itself a big step towards becoming a better leader.

Happiness – it’s not what you think it is

I have long been perplexed about happiness. Why do some people have it and others do not? We have all heard the adage that money can’t buy happiness. We unfortunately haven’t heard the other part of the story of what does bring happiness.

In my search to find out more about this, I picked up Daniel Gilbert’s book entitled “Stumbling on Happiness”. Gilbert, a psychologist at Harvard, does research on happiness. Here are a few points worth pondering.

There are two kinds of happiness. One you stumble across when you get exactly what you are aiming for. This of course rarely happens. The other is synthesized happiness. Consider the last time you purchased something but couldn’t decide between two options. Research shows that in such a situation, your rating of the option that you selected goes up after the purchase. In other words, you find reasons why you made the right chose, long after you made the purchase. This is synthesized happiness.

Synthesized happiness is as real and enduring as the other happiness.  Research shows that synthesized happiness is not inferior; it is the same quality as the other. The reason we doubt its authenticity is that we are continually exposed to marketing that attempts to make us not like our stuff and want other stuff.

Synthesized happiness works best when we are totally stuck. You find a way to be happy when you accept the things that you cannot change. Let’s go back to the shopping example where you are choosing between two options. If the store manager tells you that you can take one of the options now and you have two weeks to change your mind and switch to the other, you will torment yourself for two weeks. This is because your synthesized happiness cannot kick in until the decision is final. It is only at that point that you will unconsciously increase the happiness from the chosen option, since you cannot get the other option anyway.

While it might be tempting to suggest that buying both options will ensure happiness, this in fact opens a new level of potential unhappiness, since you are never totally stuck. You just have to sacrifice more to get there.

To add to the predicament, consider that we tend to overrate the difference between one permanent situation and another. We tend not to get as happy or sad as we initially think we will be when we envision a future situation.

So before you rush out and drop years’ worth of wages on that new sports car or truck, consider this. Research shows that the difference in your happiness between getting this vehicle and a moderate one is at best 3 months. After this your happiness will not be any different having chosen one or the other.  Happiness – it’s not what you think it is.

Be a Better Manager – Be an Effective Communicator

Bottom Line: “Great managers are great communicators”

After the Battle of Gettysburg, a ceremony was held to dedicate a cemetery for the soldiers who had died. The main speaker was a famed orator who went on for two hours. Finally, President Lincoln rose and spoke for two minutes. His talk has since has been hailed as one of the greatest speeches in history. It was 267 words in length.

Saying more does not mean talking more, it means saying the right things the right way.

Much of the frustrations and many of the inefficiencies at work come from poor communication. It leads to poor morale, higher turnover and less productivity. Conversely, effective communication can single-handedly improve all three.

In an era of cell phones when you can talk to anyone anytime, communication has never been worse. People talk a great deal, but don’t communicate. Cell phones have decreased people’s development of communication skills. Some argue that cell phones train people not to listen. Why should they, there is no need to be concise or clear, you just have to know where the “redial” button is.

Both the talker and the listener are at fault. The talker is probably trying to talk at a time when there is something else going on; walking, driving or ironically talking with others. The listener is probably doing the same.

Proper communication requires thought and attention. Much of communication is not what is said but “how” it is said. It is the subtleties of conversation that are important. The words are just one part of it.

You can’t learn proper communication by changing one thing, but it is a good way to start. Here’s an idea to move you in the right direction.

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1 - Give the punch line first. (10 words maximum)

2 - Give the details

3 - Give the punch line again.

Resist the desire to give a longwinded build-up to what you are about to say. You will lose people before you get to the punch line and have to repeat yourself again. Get their attention early and then give the details. Easy concept. Not so easy to do consistently.

This probably means that you have to think before you talk. One would have thought that this was a given, however, I think we all have ample examples to the contrary.

By the way, if you are in the mood to be inspired, Google the Gettysburg’s Address and read it. I guarantee it is a good use of two minutes.

Be a Better Manager – Accept Responsibility

Great managers take responsibility for their actions, both successes and failures. If things do not work out as desired, they figure out what went wrong, make a plan and ensure that the situation does not occur again. Others refuse to accept their responsibility and hide behind excuses. They constantly blame some external source, situation or other people for failures. There is always a reason for things not working out as planned. People who blame do not see a need to improve or change. Therefore not accepting responsibility ensures more failures in the future.

Being accountable is being able to admit that you do not have all the answers. Insecure or weaker managers never say: “I don’t know.” Instead they promise to get back to you on that and waste half a day looking for something that they probably do not have. Alternatively they give you an answer that they hope is correct and waste your time if it is not correct. They see an admission of not having the answer as a sign of weakness.

An essential attribute of a good manager is enough self-confidence to be able to admit mistakes and know that they will not ruin him. While it is a humbling experience to admit errors in front of peers and supervisors, there is nothing lost and most likely much gained by admitting that you are human.

People look to management for cues on how to act in various situations. Seeing the manager not accepting responsibility will send a clear signal that this is the accepted manner of dealing with shortcomings or failures. Not accepting responsibility means that people have no desire to learn. The outcome is that more energy is spent finding excuses than fixing the problems so that they do not happen again.

A manager who lacks emotional maturity and feels compelled to project the image of being all-knowing soon looses credibility. Conversely, the manager who is able to respond by saying “you have posed a great question, please look into it further and let me know what you find out” provides support and guidance to an employee through compliment and encouragement. Such a manager understands the value of growing people and demonstrates emotional maturity, an attribute common to all great managers.

Be a Better Manager – Become a Leader

Managers are hired to ensure that things get done right, on time and on budget. They administrate, focus on systems and look after the short-term concerns.  While this is essential to keep companies going, more is needed if companies want to grow.

All companies that I work with want to grow.  For some it is a modest increase, for others it is dramatic. Regardless of the level of increase, companies that want to grow need more from their managers, they need them to become leaders.

Leaders are capable of taking companies to higher levels. They have a clear vision of where they company is going and also have the ability to motivate and guide others to get there. They do so by using skills developed over time or learned from others.

Leaders are willing and able to innovate and think of better ways of doing things. They are not satisfied with the way things are going, but continually think of what could be improved. They do not simply administer, but rather constantly innovate.

Leaders focus on people. They realize that systems and structures must be put in place to create and run a company. They however, know that managing means managing people, not systems and structures. They understand the systems, but they manage the people.

Leaders look ahead, anticipate and even help create the future. They see how today’s actions impact the future. They realize that future success is dependent on decisions taken today. They do not get immersed in only short-term concerns. They can envision where they want to go and make decisions that will take them there.